Morning Star: Daily Astrology for October 13, 2014

This morning we wake up to Moon in Gemini moving away from an opposition with Mars (1:13 AM) and waxing into a trine with Mercury in Libra (1:59 PM). The reviewing and revising of collected information gains emotional importance under this aspect. How you perceive information or the context you place it in has emotional ramifications. People may be prone to speak to their minds. Or this could even be an energy that prompts you to get in touch with old friends you've not spoken to in awhile.

I recently had a Mercury Rx moment that contained echoes of Venus/Pluto. I was cleaning out my closet and re-discovered an old VHS player and a box of videos that I purchased right after my divorce. I packed this stuff away 10 years ago when I bought the house I'm living in now.

I laughed as I looked through some of the movie titles. Hope Floats. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Last of the Mohicans. Legends of the Fall. Most of them were heart ripping love stories. My Pisces Moon trine Mercury in Scorpio was apparently taking over since my tastes were a bit masochistic but held a high preference for intelligent yet deep story lines.

As I was re-watching some of these titles, I remembered advising people earlier this month that their words may come back to them under this retrograde. I'm now prompted to advise that your thoughts could also come back for you to review. As the Moon begins her journey through Cancer today, you could also be surprised by some memories that resurface due to various stimuli.

I had memories, alright. Memories of guilt and shame because my marriage failed and I played a HUGE part in the demise of it. My parents and kids loved the guy. I felt I had let them all down by leaving him. Besides, as far as the outside world knew, we were the perfect couple.

Problem was, I began learning to say “No” in those days. I felt ridiculously selfish for it, too. It also completely threw people off.

I had rented a house for my children and I. In our early days there, we had no appliances. We used a beverage cooler for food storage and cooked on a propane camping stove. My kids were set. I made sure of that. I brought every bit of their furniture with us. So, we didn't have a stove, but, by golly, we had a Foosball table!

I, however, had no furniture. My bedroom consisted of a couch cushion as a bed and several plastic milk crates stacked up to create a TV stand. I surrendered full control of the living room to my kids and their friends (and the Foosball table). Therefore, I spent a lot of time on my couch cushion watching movies on my milk crate supported 19 inch TV. No one understood why I would leave a nice country farm with a 6 bedroom newly remodeled house for a couch cushion and a beverage cooler.

Needless to say, re-watching these old VHS tapes brought back a lot of memories and provided room for a personal re-assessment of where I was then vs where I am now. Then, like I said, I was ashamed for acting in accordance with what I wanted and seemingly disregarding everyone else's feelings about it. I was scared, because, even though I knew I had the power to pull myself out of the hole I had just thrown myself in, I wasn't really sure exactly how I would do that yet. Then, I had no idea that within less than a year's time I would be the owner of my own home with all new appliances (and cable) and my first brand new car. I did know, however, that things were going to improve because I was just too stubborn to allow them to get worse. I was also extremely motivated by a desire to make life as close to normal as possible again for my children. It was a very pivotal time in my personal history. One that had ramifications that would echo for years to come.

Now, I'm happily re-married, my kids are grown and I still sleep next to milk crates. I stacked them up and made a nightstand/bookshelf out of them. They stand as a constant reminder of “where I was.” The journey back in time that these movies provided reminded me of my own discovery of “who I am.” Before this period in my life, I hadn't given it much thought. I took ownership of my life in those days. Even though I had few physical possessions at the time, the knowledge that I had 100% power over myself and the direction of my life meant more to me than piles of gold.

My interest in Astrology and the Spiritual world sparked at those times too. No way my ex-husband would have let me explore these areas while we lived together. As a matter of fact, after our divorce he found out I had these interests and became convinced I was possessed. He even consulted a priest and a psychologist (he isn't even Catholic). I'm not kidding. After I got past the fear of him catalyzing some crazy stuff that could result in losing my kids, I played the heck out of his fear in this area. I should probably feel shame over that, but, I don't. It was too freaking entertaining. It was completely an Aquarius vs Aquarius battle. Except THIS person with Aquarius energy also had Neptune (and a ton of Pluto). It was awesome. To this day he is still very wary of me and my “Devil Powers” (as he puts it), which, I also find hilarious.

Basically, I'm telling you all of this to illustrate a few points. One, being over accommodating and leaving yourself out of your arrangements in partnerships can put you in a hole of dissatisfaction quickly. With Sun/Venus in Libra, this is a huge possibility. Second, if you have scenarios that emerge that throw you back in time (like the one I just described) treat it in the appropriate context...as a personal checkpoint for re-assessment. You don't have to emotionally torture yourself over memories of where you were. Just observe and then time travel bit by bit back to where you are today. What has changed? How have you changed? What have you learned? Let go and re-orient yourself as needed.

After the Moon's trine with Mercury, she is Void until entering Cancer at 7:31 PM. As the Moon passes through Cancer, there will be plenty of tight squares in the sky to contend with. Cardinal Moons are due to continue to be pressurized. Plus, we are still in between eclipses. Weird stuff is popping loose all over the place. Be easy with yourself and others. Look for possibilities in potential setbacks. Change breeds opportunity. Cardinal energy is capable of monopolizing the heck out of that fact. But, you have to wrap your brain around it properly and be able to deal with the influx of emotions in order to see it.