I draw cards every morning. However, I rarely share them as they are geared more toward personal information than something for the collective. My draw incorporates 3 cards. The first is for the general energy of the day. The next for the energy I can look to for guidance. The final, the lesson I can take from the day.
Sometimes the messages I receive from this daily draw are so literal, I nearly choke on them.
Before I get into what was significant about this draw for me, let me tell you what I did prior to that. I've been feeling a bit more than overwhelmed lately. I'm fairly sure I'm not alone in that. The energy in the air right now is certainly pressurized and how you deal is directly tied to your ability to withstand/endure/persevere through pressure.
I thought, perhaps, it would help to make a list of the things I HAVE to do. This involves separating what I want to do versus what I have to do…because there is a difference. Sometimes we have to do things that we do not necessarily want to do. You know? These two things "want to" and "have to" are not infinitely connected.
So, I do that (separate" want to" from "have to") and construct this unbelievably long list of tasks that need to be checked off. I'm not 100% keen on follow through. So, I also did something I rarely do. I re-read what I had written down.
In that, to my surprise, I found over 80% of that list was actually NOT my responsibility.
Wait a minute. Let me re-read this again.
Yeah. I'm no math whiz but my 1980 something Radio Shack calculator confirms 80%. I trust that.
I laughed at myself and that little realization as I quickly began uncrossing the things that basically were not my "bitch" so to speak. And, then, went on with my morning.
I drew my cards and for guidance I turned up the Three of Swords.
Really? I immediately took from that to look at where your heart is breaking. Can you put your finger on it? Or would you have to use the entirety of your body to embrace it and still have some just out of reach?
Then I remembered…Three of Swords correlates to SATURN IN LIBRA. The hamster that runs the wheel in my head stopped dead in its tracks and started back peddling in an effort to connect that to my list. Doing your part in partnerships and drawing effective boundaries WITHIN those relationships was part of Saturn in Libra's job. Plus, Swords are mental even though several of the cards within the suit do portray direct physical anguish. BUT, body does have a tendency to follow the mind. Meaning, if something is attacking you mentally, it does also have physical ramifications. Make sense?
Libra, the sign itself, is a pretty prominent thing right now. North Node is in Libra. Mars Rx is in Libra. There's a freaking eclipse coming in Libra next week. So yeah. Libra is right in your face smiling. What better time to employ the lessons we encountered with Saturn's passage through the sign.
These aren't lessons that were taught just for use during Saturn in Libra. Saturn builds upon itself. So, you have to get Saturn in the sign before in order to learn Saturn where it is now. Capiche?
My act of sitting down with my overwhelm, attempting to figure it out and discovering I was taking ownership of stuff that SHOULD belong to someone else was…interesting to say the least. It prompted me to call up those old lessons of Saturn in Libra, blow the dust off those volumes and say…hmmmm.
Out of all the time Saturn spent in Libra, there was ONE THING that absolutely blew my mind. And, as a person with nearly everything in my natal chart shoved right in up Libra's…er…scales, you can bet on the fact I REMEMBER those days well.
I was walking my dog one evening and the thought occurred to me, "What would you do if all your relationships vanished? Poof. Gone. They aren't coming back ever." EEEEEEEEEEEP! Immediately I went into panic mode…any powerhouse Libran would! Finally, I calmed down enough to hear the rest of the question, "How would you organize your day?"
HUH? I. Couldn't. Answer. That. Question. And, I cried over the thought of it for days. Then it actually HAPPENED! In ONE DAY I lost the majority of every relationship I had known. Most of them, I'd known since birth meaning I had NO IDEA what life was like without them.
Apparently answering that question was not optional for me. And, I got to tell you, it took me a very long time come back to center after that. But, when I did, I had decided…yeah, we aren't going to do that anymore. Meaning, I ultimately decided that I am not my relationships.
So…this morning I pulled one of those little swords out of my heart and started using it to cut away some weight I had no business carrying or worrying about. I reminded myself of the things that I had learned over the recent years. We all need reminders sometimes.
But, there was something else. I also started thinking about Chiron. 1) Because my Chiron in Aries is wrapped all kinds of up in this Cardinal Cross and 2) Because Chiron in Pisces IS involved in this Cardinal Cross. Oh. Yes. It. Is. Look at him sitting over there unassumingly at 15 degrees Pisces. He isn't getting any of the press but he's in play.
There's healing to be had in this. Universally, Chiron IS involved in this cross through sextile to Pluto, inconjunct to Mars, trine to Jupiter and semi-sextile to Uranus in Aries. Put that together. You don't understand how your old mode of operations in relation to "the other" is hurting you (Chiron in Pisces inconjunct Mars RX in Libra). Reconstructing your base operations will foster healing (Pluto in Capricorn sextile Chiron in Pisces). The hurt may feel big and overwhelming (Chiron trine Jupiter) and have deeply embedded roots that link to your emotional well being (Jupiter in Cancer). But, you ARE motivated...being pulled forward...by a desire for personal freedom from the current strife (semi-sextile to Uranus). And, it would seem that the Universe is bound and determined that you GET this. Trust me. It's best to put the effort into doing that because it's most likely going to come at you anyway.
So, yeah. Let your broken heart guide you. And, non-coincidentally...the lesson card? The Sun. You may just discover (learn the lesson of) who you truly are in the process.
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