Disillusionment is a tough pill to swallow. I had a dream once that I saw these brilliant dancing lights off in the distance. From my perspective it looked very much like a carnival! I found this exciting in the dream (I just love carnivals). So, I rushed off toward it waiting for the sounds of the carnival music. However, the closer I came I noticed the carnival music was never heard. I slowed my pace and kept walking toward the lights only to find that it wasn’t a carnival at all! There were bright lights there and they were moving but there were violent and awful things being done at the place. I was both scared and mad. Scared because if the violence I witnessed. Mad because I really wanted to see a carnival. But alas, that’s not what I found. I stood for a moment and looked at the scene and in the end my fear overcame my anger and I slooowly backed away from the scene as quietly as I could. “Back up..walk awaaay from the crazy people. Shhh.shh..quietly”
It is disappointing when we encounter such things in real life. I don’t know about you but my first instinct is to run and hide. Bury myself away in a safe place. I might become mad and bitter. Or I might just be sad. Either way, I typically feel completely confused and in the dark. Often disappointment and disillusionment can lead to a very dark place where light itself is afraid to enter. It’s a scary thing. For some, disillusionment and disappointment are so common that it wreaks havoc on their psyche. They become ill and do terrible things to others as a result of their internalized anger. There rationale is shot. They become hopeless, angry, confused and their reasoning is completely debunk.
If you encounter this today either within yourself or within another person I’ll reiterate my warning to myself in the dream..”Back awaaaaaay from the crazy people…shhh..quietly.” If that crazy deluded person is you hopefully you will recognize it. If that crazy person is someone else don’t bank on the fact that they will recognize it. Just turn away because there is no reasoning with stupid or insane. Give it up. Get out of the situation. Do not cooperate. Do not negotiate. Pass GO really quick collect your $200 and keep moving!
Instead, focus on something concrete. What have you been working diligently on? Give focus to that. Once you are out of the mentality or situation, slow your mind down. Take everything one little piece at a time and concentrate on the mundane details of it. If you are weeding a garden, weed it meticulously. If you are cooking something, pay extra special attention to the details of the recipe. What ever it is focus for only your sake. This will take your mind off the disillusionment and direct your energy into something worthwhile. Even if it is only worthwhile to you the attention to the detail will create a better quality product. Know that you may be the only one that notices it at this point, and that’s ok. You didn’t kill anybody right? You did something productive instead. Pat yourself on the back for that one!
On a side note, electronic communications are still a befuddlement right now. Automobile mishaps are rampant from cars breaking down to accidents. So by all means if you are traveling take all safety precautions. Slow down. Watch others on the road and be careful! Know that your computer is really not going to be your friend for awhile. You may have to rely on the standby of pencil to paper (do they still make that stuff?) But hang in there. Be patient with yourself and others. And if all else fails, scurry to that safe place for awhile where you know the crazy clowns can’t find you.
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